A Message To My Friends....

I know that many of my friends on FB and Twitter are probably wondering if I have gone insane.  The answer to that would be, temporarily! Many of my postings after Kevin died were filled with anger and bitterness and then I hit a low where I was no longer angry, just sad.  I just haven't had it in me to fight anymore.  Talking politics was the way Kevin and I started our mornings over a cup of coffee.  Without him, it didn't seem important anymore.

I have spent most of my time these past months sitting on the back porch staring out onto the property.  (It is still hard for me to believe that almost a half a year has passed, it still feels like yesterday) Asking why, crying a lot and trying to find a glimpse of Kev in the sky, the tree's, the animals or anything around me.  I have spent most of my time trying to wipe out the memory of that last day, the guilt, the sadness, the unbelief and the horrible pain it left in my heart.