Dear Dingbats...

...... who wish to secede. I have good news! Since it would be impossible for each state to come up with the money to buy the land from the federal government I have come up with a solution. If y'all move to Texas, throw your money into one pot then I really think you could pull this off.

For all the millions who did not sign the
petition, they are probably the middle class so just do what you do best and hold them hostage.

The really good news, you could fight Mexico for the land again and we all know you guys appreciate a good fight! 

Romney will bring all the bayonets and horses you will need. Ryan will bring your vouchers and ladies don't worry about being raped and pillaged. Your body will shut that down.